Write Your Way to a Stronger Marriage

Many thanks to Dr. Stephen Frueh and Shannon Sanford at WTBQ New York for a fun and informative talk about marriage and writing this morning on Dr. Frueh's monthly show, "The Marriage Conversation." We had a wonderful time discussing how writing can be an effective tool for keeping lines of communication open in any kind of partnership, including marriage.

One of the tools I suggested couples can use to deepen their relationship and improve communication is to write a "Love Letter." It's an effective guide to exploring and expressing feelings and thoughts devised by Chris Pringer many years ago. Here is the template, if you'd like to try it. You can visit Chris' website here.

Journaling is another very powerful way to discover yourself and your feelings. I spend at least 15 minutes with my journal every morning. It doesn't have to be a work of art. In fact, you're more likely to discover feelings and thoughts by allowing yourself just to write without thinking. Natalie Goldberg's books Writing Down the Bones and Wild Mind, and Julia Cameron's The Artist's Way provide instruction and prompts to get you started. Anyone can write. You just have to have a willingness to explore, and be vulnerable and open to what comes up.

Catching Up

Happy April and National Poetry Month!
 
I've been immersed in writing for my master's program the past couple of months, and so haven't had a chance to blog. But I did want you to know about some exciting happenings.
 
First, The Writer magazine is excerpting the first chapter of my 2010 book on publishing industry changes in its May issue, which should be on newsstands soon. I am delighted! Many of the trends I saw emerging two years ago have come true in spades, particularly the explosion in self-publishing. Pick up a copy if you have a chance. And thanks to Elfrieda Abbe and Writer mag senior editor Ron Kovach for publishing it.
 
My authorlink.com column for April is up (see it here), dealing with how to improve your writing platform by speaking and becoming an expert in your field.
 
Tomorrow, tune into WTBQ in New York (9 a.m. Pacific, noon Eastern), when I'll be a guest on Dr. Stephen Frueh's radio show, "The Marriage Conversation." We'll be talking about how writing can be a powerful tool for strengthening a marriage - or any relationship. You can listen to it live online. Just click on the "listen now" button.
 
I'll be reading my poetry with my Sunday Poetry Group here in Santa Barbara on Sunday, April 15, from noon to 2 p.m., at Karpeles Manuscript Museum. Come by if you're in town. This month there are dozens of poetry events in Santa Barbara. You can see the schedule here.
 
Let me offer a plug for my friend Christopher Moore's new book, Sacre Bleu, out this week. If you haven't discovered Chris' wonderful, wacky and fun books, you are missing out. I can't wait to read his latest.
 
Wishing you continued success in all your writing endeavors! As always, would love to hear your news.

A Beautiful Day for Writing

It's been a beautiful day here in Santa Barbara. I have been writing, and revising my 25-page critical paper for my MFA, over the weekend (it's almost done!). And I got to go out and take a long walk along the ocean bluffs with my dog, Chevella, this afternoon. The Daylight Savings Time shift is always disconcerting to me. I like the longer days, but I don’t like the change twice a year. I’d be happy if things just stayed the same all the time.

Even so, I feel productive today, despite the loss of an hour. I have started one of my two required book annotations this month, and am enjoying (as a work of exquisite nonfiction) the book Hiroshima, which we will discuss in my MFA mentor group next week.  I also have been trying to get as much writing done on my memoir as possible. My writing group acts as a wonderful incentive that way: I have to have 5,000 words of new material by next weekend. We meet once a month, and I specifically formed this group to give me feedback (and provide feedback to women writers I admire) when I started my MFA program.

I’ve also been submitting some of my poetry to literary magazines this week. This feels like such a shot in the dark, but I get a tremendous sense of satisfaction from writing poetry, and I’ve had a couple of poems accepted for publication, which only encourages me. That’s a good thing.

I’ve been delighted to hear from some of you who read my blog. My friend Karin Finell has a new memoir about her late daughter, Stephanie, coming out in the fall from the University of Missouri Press, which published Karin’s first memoir, Goodbye to the Mermaids, A Childhood Lost in Hitler’s Berlin.

Would love to hear what your latest projects are. And what you are doing to get them out into the world. Cheers!

Social Media Matters

In January, I wrote a blog post offering twelve steps toward building a platform in 2012, and promised to write a specific blog about each step throughout the year. Today, I want to focus on why writers should embrace social media. There are two important reasons : first, it builds a fan (or customer) base and, second, it allows you to interact with readers, which also strengthens your customer base.

Engaging in social media need not take a lot of time. If you plan carefully, you can execute a strong social media strategy in less than 90 minutes a day. Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn might seem the most obvious social networks to begin with, but there are a number of writing and book sites that could provide as much or more exposure if you plan accordingly.

If you write fiction or nonfiction books, I recommend you have both Facebook and Twitter accounts, and use them to provide “news you can use” type updates and tweets. The rule is everything you post should provide some kind of value, so endless postings asking people to buy your book is a no-no. In fact, it’s likely to lose you more followers than you gain.

It’s okay to promote your book or some other service occasionally, but you’re better off providing useful information and a link that drives readers back to your own website where you offer your books for sale. The softer sell is always preferred. A good rule of thumb is 10 percent promotion/90 percent information.

But I also like to post helpful writing and publishing information on sites like www.shewrites.com, www.redroom.com, www.fictionaut.com, www.goodreads.com and www.waenetwork.com (Writers, Agents & Editors) to help drive traffic back to my website. Comment on others’ posts and comments, and always provide a link back to your own site.

I usually spend about 30 minutes in the morning looking through Twitter posts and re-tweeting those I think will be helpful to writers. I also look through all my e-newsletters to see if there is industry news or information I can post to my Writing & Publishing group on Facebook (you can join here). I do the same at mid-day and again in the late afternoon or evening. I don’t always have time to do this, but I make it an intention every day.

Whenever I post a new blog entry, I post it to Twitter, which automatically posts it to Facebook and LinkedIn (this is a simple linking process on Facebook and LinkedIn; just do a search for “linking to (whatever site you want to link to).” If you use a software program like www.Hootsuite.com, which has a nominal monthly fee, you can schedule a day’s worth of Twitter posts (some experts suggest 15-20 tweets a day; I probably manage five or six) all at once and forget about it the rest of the day. I also like using www.Tweetdeck.com, which is free, because you have more flexibility in commenting on and retweeting other people’s posts.

Join writing groups on LinkedIn, and follow agents and editors on Twitter. If you blog, make sure you post a link to it on all the writing and book sites I mentioned above (keeping in mind the 10-90 rule).

Remember, in today’s publishing world, it’s all about exposure: how many “followers,” how many “connections” and how many “friends” you have. That is especially true if you are self-publishing. Yes, I know, it’s annoying and so high school. It’s also one of the best ways to build a platform and get noticed. So get cracking. And let me know how it goes.

January in Santa Barbara

Just a quick post today to say January was the most beautiful I can remember in Santa Barbara. And February is starting out much the same. It has been warm (in the 70s) and sunny almost every day. Here are some photos I've taken over the past two weeks at local beaches.

I usually look forward to winter as a time for cocooning and getting a lot of writing and reading done. Alas, so far this winter weather has only beckoned me out of doors. I took my journal the other day and sat at a picnic table overlooking the ocean at Summerland, a lovely little burg just south of Santa Barbara. People walked to and from the beach in their shorts and flip flops. If I didn't know better I'd think it was August. 

Focusing on my master's work and workshops and coaching has been tough! Even so, and as much as we need our seasonal rain, I'm hoping the summer breezes stay a while longer.